Be Opened

September 6, 2009


Before I went to seminary I served for a while as the Director of Adult Ministries in our Methodist Church in Texas.  As I was walking down the hall from my office to our church family dinner late one Wednesday afternoon I was approached by a man who said  Ma’am, I need some help.” We sat down and he told me his story. “I came to San Antonio to start a new job. The boss wasn’t honest and won’t pay me for the week I‘ve worked. I just need a bus ticket to get back to my wife and kids in Virginia, maybe some extra money for food.” I suspected he really wanted money to feed an addiction, but I wasn’t rude. Even an addict deserves to be treated with Christian kindness, dignity, and respect. I explained that we sent our assistance funds to the Lutheran church down the street which administered funds for several of the churches in the area. I urged him to grab a plate of food, then head over there quickly to see if they could help.

An hour later he walked into the back of the fellowship hall. I started to tell him that we didn’t allow people to ask church members for money directly, when he stuck out his hand and said, “Ma’am, I just wanted to thank you for everything. They knew your church and helped me right away. They called my pastor in Virginia to let my wife know I’m okay, and now I have a bus ticket back home.” I was surprised. Few come back to say thanks, especially when I haven’t given them money. I also felt guilty for not believing him and doing more to help. Then he gave me a big hug!

Not only was his story true, but he had gone out of his way to be thankful. I also began to feel the discomfort of being stretched by God’s Spirit. Once again my prejudices were proved wrong. It wasn’t the first time, which meant I should have known better. The scriptures echoed in my head, “Judge not lest you be judged,” and “Inasmuch as you have done it unto the least of these you have also done it to me.” But I did judge him unfairly. And in his case I did the least I could for the least of these, but what was little to me was a lot for him.

My job is hard for me sometimes. Not just being a pastor, but trying to be a genuine Christian. Often it stretches my boundaries, pushes me beyond my comfort zone. I grew up in Texas, y’all … white and upper middle class.  Not my parents, but my culture taught me in a thousand subtle ways to be racist, sexist, classist, and homophobic, not to mention anti-Semitic, xenophobic, and tribalistic.

I remember few explicit teachings of such prejudice from any adult, but I heard thousands of comments with certain shades of meaning, and my world was insulated from people not like me. And I believe that we are “marinated” in prejudice from the day we are born. It is deep wired to the point where most of us aren’t even conscious of it. So long ago I had to confess that I am prejudiced. And I have to work every day to unlearn what my culture taught me, because every day the Spirit confronts me with the ways my soul is stunted, and how I judge people wrongly and how my love falls short of including the people God loves or loving them the way Christ does.

I am comforted by the knowledge that God’s grace includes me, too. I don’t deserve it, of course. None of us does. I am comforted, too, by the gospel story today which suggests Jesus also had to unlearn the prejudices his culture taught him. Mark says Jesus and the disciples went north to Tyre – modern day Lebanon - to get away for awhile. It was hard out here for a Messiah, and he needed a vacation. But you know how it is. Just when you reach that point of physical and psychic and emotional exhaustion where you just can’t deal with one more person with a problem, somebody with a problem heads right straight at you. And maybe that’s when we are most vulnerable to the Spirit teaching us something new.

Mark says Jesus entered a house and didn’t want anybody to know he was there. He was hiding out! That’s when SHE showed up – a gentile … a woman … a foreigner – needy … persistent … in his face. She represented just about every prejudice Jesus’ culture would have wired into him from the day he was born. His culture said that only the Jews were beloved of God and those gentiles who had always persecuted God’s people would get the hell they deserved. His culture said that men mattered and that women were the property of their fathers and husbands. His culture said that Israel was the first among nations and that all other nations would be subjugated to serve them one day.

She walked right into the house  fell at his feet and said, “Help me sir. My daughter is afflicted and you can heal her.” She was respectful, more so than Jesus was with her. He didn’t want to hear her, and tried to dismiss her sharply. He said, “Let the children be fed first, for it is not right to take the children's food and throw it to the dogs” (Mark 7:27). That’s what the Jews called gentiles – dogs. It was a racial slur, and Jesus had no doubt heard it from the time he learned to speak. And he said this right out in front of the disciples, which must have humiliated her. She did not react with hostility, but replied: “Sir, even the dogs under the table eat the children's crumbs” (Mark 7:28). She persisted against his resistance, and finally breached his defenses. “For saying that, you may go,” Jesus said, “-- the demon has left your daughter” (Mark 7:29).

Matthew’s version of the story expands the conversation, and he praises her faith. But I suspect Mark’s version may be truer to Jesus’ fatigue. That’s why the story that follows in Mark may be important in showing us what Jesus learned from this experience. He and the disciples returned from Tyre to Galilee. You know what re-entry is like after a vacation, when your head is still resting on the couch but it’s time to get back to work? They brought him a deaf man with a speech impediment. There was a deep prejudice against the sick and poor in Jesus’ day, too, which is still prevalent in our day. If you had a disability, you almost certainly would be poor. And both were considered a sign of God’s disfavor. You or your parents must have done something to deserve such a fate. This time, Jesus pulled him aside in private. He put his fingers in his ears, spat and touched his tongue. “Ephphatha” he said. “Be opened.”

I wonder: is Jesus speaking to the ears and tongue of the disabled man or is he speaking to himself, and to us? Could he be saying we need to open our ears to hear the needs of the people around us no matter how fatigued or stretched we may feel? Is he calling us to open our hearts so when they open their mouths we will hear the stories of the disregarded and disenfranchised? Could he be telling us to stretch our boundaries, to respond with kindness, to remember they are God’s beloved too? Is it possible Jesus is reminding himself about what he has learned from a gentile woman?

I once wrote a thirty page exegesis on Mark’s story of the Syrophoenician woman.  I have preached it on a number of occasions and have discussed it in Bible studies and pastors groups, and I am always surprised by the reaction from people who don’t want to think of Jesus as ever needing to learn anything. Some people picture Jesus’ sinlessness as a kind of static perfection. In seminary one professor challenged our Christology by having us debate the question, “If Jesus had played baseball, would he have batted a thousand?” Silly perhaps, but some people think of Jesus as never needing directions, never mispronouncing a word or making a grammatical error – perfect in every way. But to my mind the idea that Jesus was able to learn and grow – which always means some unlearning and mind-changing – makes him both truly human and more deeply a model of spirituality for us. I know that Jesus had trouble precisely with people whose minds were made up and could never admit they were wrong. But to me this story is a beautiful example of how Jesus was able to listen and learn.

Do you remember the touchy feely psychologist routine on Saturday Night Live some years ago? She would ask every patient, “Have you looked at yourself?” “You need to look at yourself!” She was funny because this is the typical quasi-mystical mumbo-jumbo lingo of pop psychology we’ve come to expect. But it is also actually the central challenge for every therapist, teacher, and preacher – to get people to look at themselves … to be self-aware … to be self-reflective … to work with their own inner stuff. And when you try – even when they have come to you for help – even when it’s your professional responsibility and training to help them do it – you immediately meet rationalizations, excuses, anger, and resistance. Why?  Because it’s hard for people to work with their own stuff. It takes honesty, vulnerability, the ability to see ourselves as others see us. That takes courage and strong self-esteem. Most of us can tell you what’s wrong with everybody else in the world. We have loads of opinions about celebrities, political leaders, sports figures, even the people closest to us. But we don’t want to look at ourselves. We all try to hide our flaws, but they show. They show. We don’t want to see them, let alone deal with them, but how else will we ever change for the better?

The Bible is a mirror. You start reading it and pretty soon, it’s reading you. So at the risk of sounding silly, let me ask you this morning. Have you looked at yourself? You need to look at yourself. Because we all have prejudices we need to unlearn … judgments we need to question … patterns of behavior we need to change. If we have learned anything in the eight years since 9/11, haven’t we learned how much the world needs peacemakers and bridge builders, instead of more hatred and division and violence? But that begins when we stretch beyond our comfort zone to hear the people who are different from us. Jesus shows us the way. Because one day when he really didn’t feel like dealing with it he let a needy gentile woman open up his heart. Maybe that means he opens his ears and his heart to our pleas for help, too. “Not my brother, not my sister, but it’s me, O Lord….” All spiritual growth begins with that honest prayer: “It’s me. It’s me, O Lord, standin’ in the need of prayer.”  

May we pray?

Listening God,

We are so quick to judge others, but we refuse to see our own flaws. Or work on them. We are so closed minded and hard hearted, defended and defensive. We need your healing. Give us the courage to be opened, that we might grow. Open our ears that we may hear you. Open our eyes that we may see you. Open our hearts that we may love you as we encounter you in the faces and voices of the people we meet, in Jesus’ name. Amen.


Rev. Mary Anne Biggs, Pastor
Nekoosa United Church of Christ
Nekoosa
, Wisconsin